For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. Philippians 1:21

Have you ever been too deep to get out? Been in deep waters with no possibility of a return to what was? When the waters are rising and the forecast is bleak? Have started a thing that grew too big to be kept under control? Found yourself in more trouble than you bargained for? I do. I had this wish to write my book, it had been on my heart for several years before I gave in to the longing of my heart. And I did, what no every wise person will tell you NOT to do. I quit my job, thinking I had enough savings to get over the year or so of writing. And then the writing seemed to take a good hold of my life. .. Now, more than 10 years later, I sometimes wonder what happened. I wrote the book. But there is no way back to where I came from. Nothing is as it used to be. Did I die? Did the world around be die? It broke, that is sure. Not in very lovely pieces always. But I understand. To die is gain. Though I sometimes still don't understand what happened, I have won Christ, have been given grace in sometimes traumatic circumstances. Have you been there? Dying is not as easy as it sounds. But like in physical death this life has to be given up, which is hard, to win eternal life, so dying to this world will be gain. God's word says so. I found it true. Though I still wonder what hit me. Please trust God, it is much better to give up even a right, to hold the other cheek, even if you don't know why or what hit you.