"Hosea 6:3 ... And He will come to us like the rain, Like the spring rain watering the earth."

It was drizzeling the daintiest bit of summer rain...

...when I took the mad dog for a walk....

...wondering whether God thinks me as mad as I think the dog is...

...taking me on those beautifully strange walks He has the secret of. 

Job 35:5 “ Look at the heavens and see; And behold the clouds—they are higher than you.

I stand in mist and fog and rain -
the damp white softens an edge -
has it opened the door -
I am waiting for? -

The dripping rain softens the land -
washs it clean and I stand -
wishing it would wash away -
all the filth, that it may -
drown what bothers me so. -
Comforted I go, I know,
my own hearts ground. -

Grace alone I have found -
humility loosens what's bound -

Into the sky ... I fly -

Psalm 33:18 Behold, the eye of the LORD is on those who fear Him, On those who hope for His lovingkindness

If I stand, I stand in your grace.

If I fall, you will see it.

(Jesus said) Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me. John 14:1

These are comforting words. I love being comforted. And they talk abput being troubled. There may be reasons for that too. Sp many that Jesus found it worth a special mention.
Do I believe enough to put up with whatever is on my way? To I trust God enough to go through whatever is the way he lays out in front of me? Be it happy, soft paths in grassy slopes or muddy lane in damp nights.

Even the mad dog must have thought so and enjoyed.... God is amazing...

Don't be troubled, whatever appears before you, but put all worries on Jesus. And enjoy the walk in crisp wood admiring the bright flowers on your way as on mine. It is moment like such that make me think: If this is earth, heaven must be a wonderful place beyond all words or pictures.

Peter said to Jesus, "You will never wash my feet." Jesus answered, "Unless I wash you, you have no share with me." John 13:8

Free to serve God

Galatians 5:1

It was for freedom that Christ set us free; therefore keep standing firm and do not be subject again to a yoke of slavery.

We talk a lot about freedom nowadays. What is usally meant is the freedom to sin. To do things God has set as not good for us. So being free seems often to mean being free from God. 

God has given a lot to set us free. And many good people have died to procure us the right to believe. Wouldn't it be better to follow God's way? 

Freedom can make  me a better me. And as there is no freedom outside of God, it is a lie to claim being free to sin. For every bit of a missing step is slavery. Sin is where someone is bound, just try to not do it and you'll see what I mean.

May God bless you. 

There are roadsigns and there is a way to true freedom. By the grace of God. 

To be the best you'll ever be.

Trust and obey

They told me, when I'll get older, the world will fade away. Now I am getting older and it has never been so bright and beautiful before.

I have started to trust God and obey some more in very worldly matters. Namely in getting back to work for my living even though I cannot find work in my branch and have to retrain in something completely different.

I feel deep gratitude to be allowed this understanding, this doing. And the world is a lovelier place than ever, the less I cling to it as and ends in itself. 

(Ecclesiastes 3:11 He hath made everything beautiful in its time: also he hath set eternity in their heart.)

Bubbles of soap, petals of roses, rays of a fading sun, Jesus for many years seemed to be little more than a dream. Beautiful, comforting, but a dream.

Little enough it seemed having to do with every day chores, with small sorrows or bog laughters. I couldn't find  the power of God, couldn't touch his hand. I remember vividly the feeling of being cursed somehow. 

Now that I have tasted the power of God, have found his grace, I am scared at times to loose it. Its taste is sweeter than strawberries with cream and sugar, more beutiful than all the soap-bubbles in the world, more comforting than even a double rainbow after a rainy day. I have been honored by a foretaste of heaven. Jesus is no dream. 

Hopping up and down

I bought a ball. And I have been hopping up and down, sitting in front of my computer. Enjoying it much more than I usually do. For the long hours of sitting there have left marks on my condition. As formerly mentioned I lost slimness, which is I gained so much weight I never thought possible I could.Well, my grandmother on my fathers side was well rounded, I only remember her having been a small child and being awed by it. I try to own it. 

But I decided I needed to do something to at least pretend I am doing something. Cosmetics. Kind of. Hoping there will be some result anyways. Thinking of how often I try the same trick on my way to God. Cover up. Do some cosmetics around some not so desireable reality of my life. Hoping that God sees the effort and supplies enough grace to get through to me. For more than once there is nothing else I know to do. Desperate effort, kind of. 

And then I sit happily on my ball, hopping up and down, feeling great. And thankful. What a wonderful idea. I'll try and make a picture to give you an idea. Silly. Giddy. How small things can make the life bright at times. How a kind smile or a flower or a ray of God's light can change within minutes the outlook on life. I listen to spiritual jazz on accu-radio. It is great and free. And they are playing a lot of the great hymns in a jazzier version. 

My feet are not swollen, my back feels just fine, my ears enjoy the music, God's grace seems to close in on me. I am thankful. Very. God is awesome in encouraging on what might have been another lonely evening. Though - actually I love lonely evenings with lots of time for writing.... anyways... may God bless you.

2 Timothy 3:12 says: ...All that would live godly in Christ Jesus shall suffer persecution.

Psalm 18:2

That has quite shocked me when I first read it. Our countries in western world have been built on christian principles, have they not? Where could persecution possibly come from?  God's word says clearly that this world obeys to a hellish taskmaster. 

(Ephesians 6:12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.) 

So where would persecution come from but from friction between rulers. We are soldiers in the army of Christ, we constantly rub against the maximes of this world. It only shows, that we don't belong here. It is not something exceptional, but the normal life of a believer.

A lot of trouble can come from persecution, but it is an honor to live it, as God is testing patience, building a character, helping us to be at ease when we finally stand in front of him.

Deut 6:20

It is with us according to God's good and perfect will. God has the right to do to us exactly the way he wants to. And we will all eventually grow old, sick and die. Persecution, poverty, old age, sickness, catastrophies and the likes, they are the challenges of this life. When the tower of Siloam fell and 18 died, Jesus just said, that we would all die alike if we would not repent and belive. (Luke 13:4) These are hard words in our time, where everybody seems persuaded we have all rights to comfort. I couldn't find that in my bible. And I think it keeps us from experiencing the greatest of all wonders: The presence of the Lord.

Heaven is a wonderful place

Me on an average day and mood.

It has been at the back of my mind that I might start a blog.  As I love writing that seems fair enough. More so I love writing on the amazing things happening, when someone (me) is seriously searching for God and won't let go without an answer. (Remember Jacob and his hip?)
My life is quite upside down, there is nothing better than to write about it. Phil 3:8 says: I count all things to be loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ.
That is an easy thing to say. But in everyday life not very comfortable. I have alawys been working quite hard, loved it, been quite skinny. Guess what: I lost it all.

Shay and the hole

I am a tough cookie, I restart. But I am a pain to myself. Having a comparatively poor place, a mad dog, little money, no car places me in an awkward spot of life. Specially if the dog is eating part of the wall. It makes everything just a little bit more acute.  (So sorry, I know the picture is quite bad, but it is my mobile. The camera got lost in London. I never quite figured whether I forgot it somewhere or whether it got stolen by that sinister individuum following me around, which made me forget it....)

So I decided to write it all. The glorious days and the bad nights, God's grace and my tears, wondering myself how much I'll get done.

Well, I got the beginning done. (Rejoice in the Lord, always. Phil 3:1)