Genesis 1:31 God saw all that he had made, and it was very good.

I made a man today. More the figure of a man. But it moves and turns and is quite amazing. And it made me completely happy to see it move and to be able to render thoses moves. And it made me think. This was made out of bits and bytes. With a figure out of the library.
God didn't need a library. Was he happy, not to say giddy, when man moved and spoke?  When he gave the animals a name? When God walked in the garden with him?
Is he very satisfied when he is watching those tiny creatures of his? Us.
We are fearfully and wonderfully made, the psalm says. And God saw it and it was very good. We are. Much more than my tiny creatures will ever be. We are very well made.
Lets put it to good use. Lets please make him not only happy, but proud.

Psalm 124:7 We have escaped like a bird from the fowler’s snare; the snare has been broken, and we have escaped.

Have you ever had that feeling of not being able to get out? Of being held against your will? Of missing maybe just an inch to be.... the winner, the loved one, the successful?

I am watching some of the Olypic games and even though usually it is pretty evident who is the winner, often only a picture decides who was first. Or second or third. The tears of a forth seem to be the bitterest. So close, yet missed. Maybe for years, maybe for ever.

We have a gracious God who has provided a way out. Out of misery, out of envy, out of bitterness. Like a bird escaping from the snare, like the rabbit or the fox, avoiding to be caught. I heard, sometimes they bite off a leg to get out.

Out like getting out of evil's snares. That's not easy. But to have missed it, even if it was so close, will bring bitter tears of regret.

Psalm 74:16 The day is yours, and yours also the night; you established the sun and moon.

While the sun shines, everything casts a shadow. The hotter the sun, the blacker the shadow. The shadow may vary in size and hue and whereabouts. But inevitably it will be there.

Men are like that too. When they are in the light of God they cast shadows that follow them around. Some small ones, some big ones. A shadow is a place, where the light is blocked out because some object comes inbetween the sun and the ground.

Man's ego can very easily cast such a shadow on his neighbors. Where because of his size the next will stand in the dark. There are people, who make huge shadows in which nearly nothing grows. There are others who make tiny shadows and some even reflect the light to give it to others.

Instead of drinking up all available strength, they reflect it for others to grow. To flourish. Maybe the seem to just a shadow themselves, for they have become like a fleeting shadow themselves for fear to block the light in someone elses life.

May God be praised for all true light is his.

Matthew 5:4 Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.

It is a terrible condition man is in. It is terrible, what man will do to man. It is terrible, what we are capable of in the bad sense of the word. One man killing so many. Terrible. There seems to be no comfort, no words to be found. No way to express the feelings stuffed up.

And there is greater danger. Danger is in scorn, in anger, in judgement. Who will comfort us then? Who can we look up to then? 

Maybe we should be thankful instead. Thankful this doesn't happen more often. Thankful to know there is a peaceful place waiting for the faithful. Thankful to be kept out of touch with what festers in the soul.  Thankful to be in the hand of a God, who has the all rights on our lives. Even to take them as he pleases. The comfort lies in humbly bowing to God.

I so wish I could give thoughts of comfort, figuring my own horror if it was my friend or son, hurt or killed. Please bow with me in prayer. Let this not be a temptation to sin on our part. Please. Resist the temptation to hurl all your anger, hurt, brokenness on this one act of open lostness. Pray. I will pray too.

1 Corinthians 8:3 But whoever loves God is known by God.

Sometimes I feel like that. Shattered. Floating, falling. But I know, God knows me, he sees me and he holds me in his hand. I can never fall out of it. That is quite a comfort. But quite terrifying as well. For He who sees all, knows all, having a hold on my tiny bit of being is frightening. Like contact with powerful people often is. Why would he do that? Hold me? And what for? Will that potter make me a thing I can agree with? Not that he has to... .

So God created mankind.... Gen. 1:27

So God created mankind.... Gen. 1:27

I created this picture using a program new to me. So this is the first very basic image, my first creation of a "man". In case you wonder, the head is towards the sky, the highest part is an arm. Or should be.
Of course, God is almighty, but did he think on how to do this? I wondered while trying so hard and yet failing again and again. Would God love to try and find new forms and give them new names? Enjoying his creation, knowing it is perfect for what it is at that point?
Is that a very disrespectful train of thought? It is not to me, I assure you.

On the other hand this picture reminds me of the fall. When man fell, he didn't even know what falling was and when he found out, it was unpleasant, it was too late. Many good things get lost that way. Falling is a very nasty feeling. At least if there is no parachute to stop the fall. How many things we do, whose consequences we cannot understand, maybe until it is way too late?

And - another shocking thought - after God had created man, even though he knew all that would be, was it hard on him when man turned his back and said: I don't want you, I don't need you? That temptation is so typically mankind. So God created mankind.... Gen. 1:27

 Do you think he ever regretted having done so? It cost him a high price. Do you ever regret something, whose consequences were a deep fall?

Proverbs 20:15 Gold there is, and rubies in abundance, but lips that speak knowledge are a rare jewel.

Jewels are talked about in two ways mainly in the bible: The one is very positive, where the bride will adorn herself with jewels to please her bridegroom. 


The other is more sinister:They will also strip you of your clothes and take your fine jewelry. Ezekiel spoke that to the people of Israel after it had abandonned the Lord. He predicted complete ruin for those, who had found grace but rejected it.


Many have lusted for fine jewels, for possessions, for gold. They made riches their idol and paid a high price for it. Riches again have mainly two meanings: The (by Jesus despised) riches of this world, and the riches of God's world. Of his kingdom. 


How many today have found jewels of wisdom? Or spend a lot of time searching for the jewels knowledge, for the riches of God? Or have so many, that they are able to give away some?


I think it is, what makes someone like Indiana Jones so popular. We all crave riches. But there is little time. Just whose? Which ones are you searching for? Which ones seem more desirable to you? 

Song of Songs 4:16 Awake, north wind. Come, south wind! Blow on my garden, that its fragrance may spread everywhere.

 My garden has often helped me remember God's word. I made this a preface to one of the little videos I make. I am quite proud of it. (This is the avatar of my farm, Mara's Prayer Garden. Come and visit sometime.)

 And I wish I was much like the garden, Solomon is talking of. Have the sweet scent of God's presence be all about. Blown by the Spirit of God. I never know whether I truly make it thus far, but I keep working as much as I keep working my virtual farm to make it a nice place.

May the sweet scent of God's presence be with you always.

Lamentations 3:5 He has besieged me and surrounded me with bitterness and hardship.

3 ^[a]I am the man who has seen affliction 
    by the rod of the Lord’s wrath. 
² He has driven me away and made me walk
    in darkness rather than light;
³ indeed, he has turned his hand against me 
    again and again, all day long.

⁴ He has made my skin and my flesh grow old
    and has broken my bones. 
⁵ He has besieged me and surrounded me
    with bitterness and hardship.

Jeremiah complains bitterly to the Lord. Everything seems to be so wrong. If he is a righteous man, why is everybody trying to make him fall?

I have wondered when in pain: Where is God? Why would he let that happen. Sometimes it is my pain, sometimes somebody elses pain. Is God watching me, us, fall, fail, cry, die?

Jeremiah thinks so. He thinks it is God who is sending those things to teach him a lesson. Like Paul said much later: I am the clay in the potters hand. Who am I to complain or even to judge? 

The clay needs to be prepared. It needs to be beaten and kneaded to be useful.

So do we. We need the pain to come back from our sinful ways. To cry out to the Lord.

(Jesus) replied, “Blessed are those who hear the word of God and obey it.”

There are two ways of understanding. Or more. One of them is hearing, what is said, the other one is doing what has been spoken about. Even the first one isn't evident. How often are words distorted, misunderstood, ridiculed. To understand, what somebody is saying is already a great thing. But to then go and forget all about it is not the reaction, Jesus is expecting. Blessed are those who hear, meaning understand what has been talked about, and who go and do, what needs to be done.
If I understand, that lying or betraying someone is sinful behaviour, to say I am sorry isn't enough. I have to change that behaviour.
In the doing there is much happiness, blessing and contentement. To do something God wants me to do is a reward in itself, even if the whole world stands up against it. Blessed are those who hear and do.

1 Cor. 13:4,7 Love is patient. Love is kind. It bears all, it hopes all, it endures all.

I just moved. It wasn't as much work as I thought it might be and it went quite well. But moving made me feel like a leaf in the wind again. So dependant on a lot of things I have no control over. I am so glad God is in control in the end. Even where adverse winds seem to blow me into directions I dislike. God knows. He allows. All the pain and frustration. The crushed hopes and shattered illusions and lost days. "Like gold needs to be melted in the fire to be pure, so I need this adversity to be purified, refined, cleansed. - To be honest, as honest as I can think right now - I probably desrve much worse for all the times I denied Jesus, like Peter in the courtyard. Scared for my own skin. My success, my populatity, my survival. That white lie, it doesn't hurt, does it? God will understand. Won't he?
He will understand. He knows we can't help it. We are doomed if left to ourselves. But Jesus showed us a ways to come back: Be forgiven and forgive. Both are not always easy to come by. And I still feel blown around by many hostile winds.
I see pictures of tornados, how they kill or destroy or cause much anxiety and trouble. Whether God's wind or not, winds can have quite an impact. To trust God doesn't come easy or naturally. But I can do it. And so can you.

1 Cor 13:4 Love is kind.

My heart so often seems to fly on every wind coming by. Have you ever felt that way? Scripture says, love is kind. Am I always? What, if my heart gets blown away, when I seem to loose love like a glove forgot on a park bench? And where is God's kindness to me when I am in pain and need, want or fear? Are they God's kindness to me?
Paul wrote, that being in all kinds of suffering is building a godly character. So is it a grace to be suffering? Paul said too: Give thanks for all things. That is not very easy. Not when I am confused and hurting, when the world seems to run a course I cannot follow. Give thanks for pain and sorrow? Even feeling honored because they are God's kindness to me?
And what about those around me. When someone is really in need and pain, suffering, be it on the outside through torture or hunger or nakedness or be it on the inside through loneliness, depression or abuse. Can i say: Rejoice, this is God's kindness to you? For we know, that God loves at all times. Many have postulated that as a huge problem. Why God allows so much pain.
If now I say, it is even a grace and a kindness, will I laughed at or cut out like Jesus was? Maybe that's the reason why they did put Jesus on the cross. Too strange seems this. Too much is our live circling around well-being in this desolate place of a world. And if that suffering where the road to heaven, could I embrace it as God's kindness to me? Could you? God is love. So we should take all from his loving hand with thanks.
The happy times and the times we feel sorry for ourselves. Maybe that is a big sin. For it would doubt God's eternal love.

Matthew 9:36 When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.

Crowds are not really a sum of many persons. A crowd is more and less at the same time. Jesus often talked to "the crowd". He realized, that a crowd reacts to different things than a person does. A person, cpnfronted him, might shy away, but the crowd cried both, crown him king and crucify within a very short time span. It is very difficult or even maybe impossible to stand on what I know to be right the moment there is a crowd. for the crowd will follow its "bed" and stamp over everything that stands in its way. That is how huge rock-concerts generate enthusiasm or football or baseball games get cheering crowds.
A crowd is a dangerous place to be, if I don't agree with it. But if I secretely agree, it is the safest place to do, what I might long to do but dare not otherwise. Even following Jesus was a phenomenon of the crowd. Everybody went. So many may have gone without conviction. But it was, what everybody does. And that is hard to resist, be it for better or for worse.
Jesus didn't judge the crowd. he pitied them for he knew, they had no real chance to take a stand. Which is my point here. If you'd like to take a stand, get away from the crowd, the "chicken", who hack everybody into place, and find out what is right. Jesus went into the desert, he told his disciples to pray in a room, hidden from eyes, to be able to concentrate on the father. No matter how big or how good the crowd - many megachurches are crowds too, don't loose youself in it but take a stand for God. Alone. Whether the crowd is on your side or not.

John 8:34 Jesus replied, “Very truly I tell you, everyone who sins is a slave to sin.

John 8:34 Jesus replied, “Very truly I tell you, everyone who sins is a slave to sin. - In these times of war, pain, disaster, poverty many people long to be free. Usually, by being free they - and we - mean to have our western freedom to speak, eat, sleep in a bed, being able to work, love, hope, go to school or leave it as seems to fit the mood. Free from the tyranny of dictators of this world. But there is one dictator, nobody can escape. His name is sin.
As long as we commit any sin, even the smallest, we admit we know our ruler. It is inborn. The need to sin is inborn to us. Inherited like a genetic code. We wouldn't do better than Adam and Eve. They are prototypes of the human race. We might even do a lot worse. 
I sometimes wonder, whether this inborn need to sin has been spread into nature. The lion didn't always eat meat. He started to do so after Noah came out of the arc. Maybe many more ills of nature are bound to our fall. Paul said so. he wrote that all of nature is groaning, expecting to be freed from slavery. 
Does even the butterfly sin? In all its innocent and fragile beauty? How can he - how can I ever be free? Grace be to the Lord Jesus Christ who opened a door for all, a to get away from the worst tyrant of all: Sin.

Psalm 147:1 Praise the LORD. How good it is to sing praises to our God, how pleasant and fitting to praise him!

I have wondered sometimes, whether this world is more to God that a game. A game of dice if you like. Are we the dice? Has he been playing dice to decide how to build this world? Some physicists say, there was no other world, no other univers possibly creatable. But Nils Bohr said even a hundred years ago: We cannot tell God how to create worlds.
God is supreme. He has the right to create things the way he likes.
And, actually, to be a dice in the hand of God would be big honor. His thinking about me, even if it is to drown me, is a treat, a pleasure, an honor. God has the right to do with his own as he pleases. Even if it hurts.
If he is the potter and we are the clay, as Paul wrote, he will make some things for honorable use. But most things are needed for daily or even nasty use. He will decide as he sees it fit and he will see it through.

He deserves to be praised and worshipped.

Matthew 10:29 Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground outside your Father’s care.

When I live, I live always watched by someone immensly greater than I am. I have tried to picture it here. Compared to God I am such a small entity. It is a miracle that he cares. That he is watching. Have you read: "Big brother is watching you?" There is someone watching us all. And weighting every word, every geste, every thought. Not to speak of bold actions or shameful dealings. He knows. Always.
Sometimes it seems like I expect him to understand, like the dog still wags his tail even when I come home too late. To always be on my side. He is. But in his own way. That includes sometimes not liking what he sees.
If what I do would be seen by the one person I love most or fear most, would I still be o.k with it? If everybody knew, as everybody will know, what my life is made of, will I still be proud and think it a good thing?
I often try to stay in that thought when I need to make a decision. If I looked into the eyes of the world, of God, of all those I love, would I still want to be known for having done this? For having lived my life the way I do?
Do you? Can all you do stand in front of the one, who can stand firm in front of you? The one who knows it all? Sometimes this thought scares me. Like a sparrow am I? Just a little more? Do you know how many sparrows die each moment? Could I die knowing it is God's will by still giving him praise? KNowing he is watching me fall and die?

Can you?

Genesis 15:6 Abram believed the LORD, and he credited it to him as righteousness.

The boy and the chicken. The boy, feeling immensly superior, is still watching the chicken. To be entertained? To learn? The chicken, often called a dumb creature, knows its Lord. The boy doubts. And what could a chicken know about it? Maybe the despised one knows more? 

They are both programmed. On a computer. Yet only the chicken believes in programmers. Even though without both their existences are not possible. Who is dumb then? Isn't being in touch with a greater reality smarter than some smarts? 

Paul said, he had a huge amount of cool references, but he regared them all as loss compared to the excellency of knowing Christ. Who is dumb then? Paul or the one who thought him dumb?

It often depends on the side I stand on. And whether understanding is given to me. Sometimes it seems those who think themselves smart are doomed to never doubt, to never truly search or understand. Who is dumb in the end? I pray it is not me nor you.

Romans 8:35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?

I used to sit under a power pylon crossing the river when I was a teenager. It held big power wires that crossed the river at this point. It was a big river and I couldn't always see the other side in the dark. I looked up, and it the upmost wire there were big red balls to warn planes of danger. It semed very high above me. In the middle of the river was a bigger red ball than the others. I often dreamed I could climb up there and stand in the middle of that red ball, in the middle of nowhere, reach the sky with my hands.
I would dance with joy, for reaching the heaven seemed a source of endless joy. Life has brought days, when I forget my noble thoughts and plod along in daily routines. Then I look up to the sky and think of how my thoughts used to dance thinking about heaven. And I remember that God is never far. Never farther than my next breath, than my beating heart. And the joy comes back. Can all the toils and sorrow separate me from my God? No, because he is faithful and he will hold me, even when I am not looking. There is always a reason to dance. Because no danger and pain, no trouble or persecution can separate me from the love of Christ.

1 Corinthians 13:4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

It is often difficult to love those that are closest. So much easier to give to some noble cause. But God asked Cain: Where is your brother? He held Cain accountable. Rightly so. For in envy Cain had killed Abel. He had thought himself allright and when God did not accept his offering and instead took Abels, Cains anger burned hot. What had Abel done to deserve God's favor? Scripture doesn't talk much about it. It says, that Abels heart was in his rightful place. Did Cain offer to God to be known as a good man? Did he despise his younger brother? Have they been children together, playing, talking, dreaming of great things to come? Nothing mattered any more when Cain took his brother out in the fields and slew him. 

It is a huge trap for any of us. Envy, pride, anger. God asks us to be humble, patient and kind. That's what his kingdom is all about. Not about ruling, but serving. Not in words, with a fanfare and pretty comments, but in quiet obedience. The greatest reward lies in this. Being able to be patient and kind, without boasting and envy and pride. That's where heaven begins, for me, in me, around me. Though Abel suffered, it is Cain who is to be pitied for he could not find peace in his heart. Which is the greatest good of all. The one thing worth to be live for, to be sought after, to be cherished and taught.

Luke 7:48 Then Jesus said to her, “Your sins are forgiven.”

Often we blame our leaders for doing the wrong thing. It is so easy to always blame somebody else if things don't go well. Too often refusing to tale responsability makes things worse and drops a person into deep depression on plus of a bad situation. Looking up to Jesus and taking responsabily can truly change things. Every thing else is just make-belief. Jesus can truly forgive where I fail. Where you fail. Even if it was initially not my or your fault. To stand up and ask Jesus for help and forgiveness for me or any other involved will free the mind. Will make able to go God's way. Finding peace inside. For it is all well with a soul that is truly forgiven. And I need that, never met anybody who doesn't at least have a small itsy bit to be forgiven for. That's as good as a shower after a sweaty day of work. Just - like somebody not used to showers will hesitate, so the one not used to grace may hesitate. Please, all you, take courage. This is the best news ever. It is not that Jesus doesn't care. he cares a lot. But he still forgives. All those that come to him. Have you? Will you? It is such a comfort.

Psalm 112:4 Even in darkness light dawns for the upright.

To whom light is dawning? To the upright. To the one who is compassionate, gracious, righteous. God will be there. If I am on the right side of life. If my longing is for righteousness and compassion and kindness and grace - in me. Too often longing for these qualities in somebody else is a downward spiral. "If only my friend, hubby, girlfriend, mother, son, grandma, pastor, teacher, president.... you name it, would be a little kinder, more compassionate... than I would.... the list is long. Too long. For it if I have to wait for somebody else to go to heaven before I will, I never may. If I am waiting for somebody to make room and go God's way, that may never happen and I am stuck. Often that is, what depression is. Stuck in darkness. But often in my darkness, where I refuse to admit my wrong, ask for forgiveness or confess my wrongs. It may be a hard way in the midst of disastrous situations to stand up and say: I stand on the word of God. But it is the safest way. The brightest way. The way where God's light can shine into darkness. Don't wait. Be compassionate, kind, righteous, gracious. And see if God will not give the light we are craving for.

Rom 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him. -

God is stranger than the stranges fantasy can paint. And yet, he loves me. He cares for me. Whatever happens, all things will work for the good of the ones God loves. As little as I may unerstand purpose and goal, as little as I am able to understand the one who knows every one of those billions of people by their name but also the animals and stars, from the smallest to the biggest. As alien as his kingdom may seem, as alien as I am within the holy borders od the promised land, as sure God will give us what we all long for. A Happy END.

Psalm 4:8 In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, LORD, make me dwell in safety.

The Lord protects those whom he knows. Even in sorrow and pain he cares and guides his children the safest way home, often the only way he can get the stubborn heart home. The heart that tries to tear away with so many promises, that will remain unfulfilled. Only heaven will make all dreams come true. Only God can show the way.
Even when sleeping in peace, he will keep watch. There are many dangers. Trusting in God's provision is the only safe passage through space and time.

Exodus 4:1 Moses answered, “What if they do not believe me or listen to me and say, ‘The LORD did not appear to you’?”

Has God ever appeared to you? Spoken to you? Been so close that the hair on your arm stood? Have you ever stood before God and felt his presence, his anger or his joy? And have you tried to tell somebody? Have you been sure it was God's voice who told you? There are many voices, many beings, many worlds between this and the next. Have you ever reached out to those worlds, only to be a fool in the worlds eye? Moses felt like a fool when God appeared to him and told him to go to Egypt. It seemed the least wise thing to do. But God spoke through Moses and did many powerful signs. Which made many believe, finally.ö It is God's gift to let the message we bear find grace. Still, we are to carry it. No matter how foolish it seems in the eyes of an often unbelieving world. Trust God. He can still do signs and wonders and make a voive heard, a voice that is willing to speak out for him and to risk being laughed at for showing his biggest treasure. Don't fear. Trust God. Even if it looks silly or mad. Or because it looks silly and mad.